Monday, June 13, 2011

Bucket Orchid

Labyrinthine flower
of courtship, and its
sodden bees, set free
after the glue has set

Looking into its throat
almost the shape of
an eye, or a hand, like
the origin of a myth

Disappointment only
opens its dirty palm
the second time round

The return visit-
she says to him 'Now I
see.'
Closes her eyes

7 comments:

Jyoti Mishra said...

That was very beautiful !!
Loved the lines
Looking into its throat
almost the shape of
an eye, or a hand, like
the origin of a myth

u write well.... It was a nice read.

Andrew said...

Written with a sharp nib and an even sharper eye. Thanks - good poem.

Sigerson said...

... or even the myth of origin.

love this orchid series.

Miss Jane said...

I like what you do here (and I've been enjoying this whole series). I find myself Googling the orchid to get a visual, and this species is an odd one indeed.

I also like the economy of language in this. It adds to the sneaky punch of the last stanza. Boom. Didn't see that comin', did ya?

Zeba said...

Wow.

Rathnashikamani said...

Short and sweet poem!
Poignant expression!

Katie Hogan said...

This is such a good poem, and very visual without overbearing imagery -- I imagined a surrealist painting of an orchid, but that concrete imagery strengthened rather than outweighed the abstract. In this way, it was reminiscent of what William Carlos Williams does with "Between Walls". The only criticism I would offer is that I would omit the last stanza, which I felt was a departure in tone -- it doesn't do much for the poem, and the sudden inclusion of a specific subject referenced through pronouns seems cheap next to the more subtle allusions of the rest of the poem. Ending with the 3rd stanza would, in my opinion, be a stronger ending without breaking the pace, tone, style and overall aura of the poem. But that's just my opinion. Well done either way!